Suicide Crisis: Ten Ways Parents can Help Prevent Suicide
Shockingly, suicide is the third leading cause of death for 15- to 24-year-olds in the United States. At least 90% of teens who kill themselves, according to a study by The American Academy of Pediatrics, have some type of mental health problem. This may include alcohol or drug abuse, anxiety, behavior problems, and depression. Indeed, these troubled youth also often have challenges and problems at school or with friends or family. For some, it is a combination of both. Furthermore, many of those teens that do commit suicide were victims of physical or sexual abuse.
To be sure, suicide is a growing epidemic in our society. Yet, there are ways to help prevent suicide. Below are 10 ways parents can be better equipped to help.
- Look for Signs.
Depression. Mood Swings. Severe change in behavior. Withdrawing from friends. These are just a few of the signs that your teen may be considering suicide. It is important to be able to recognize the signs of suicide. If you should suspect that your child is contemplating suicide, remain calm, and ask him about it. Do not wait for your child to come and talk to you.
2. Do not be Dismissive.
If you see some signs of suicide or suspect that your child is suicidal, do not dismiss it as “a phase” he is going through, of that it is Teenage Drama. Do not risk being wrong about this. Take it seriously.
3. Listening ALL the Time.
Your teen needs you to listen to him, even when he is not speaking aloud. There is a saying that actions speak louder than words. His actions, his behaviour, and his attitude may speak far more loudly than any words he may be saying to you. If you see that he is struggling more than usual in his daily life and routine, and that he is showing some of the signs of suicide, you must act upon this. Even if he says that he is “just fine” and that “everything is okay,” listen to what your heart and better judgement are telling you.
4. Talk to him about your Concerns.
There is the myth that if you talk about suicide, you may be suggesting it in some fashion, or “planting the seeds,” so to speak. While many may believe this myth, it is far from true. If you suspect that your child is struggling, talk to him. Let him know that you are concerned, that you care, and that you are there to help.
5. Responding with Compassion and Love.
If your teen should approach you about thoughts of suicide, do not react in a shocked or angry fashion, and do not respond in denial, either. Instead, respond in love and compassion. Thank him for coming to you and being open and honest. Let him know that you hear his pain, and that you are there to help. Reassure him that he is loved, and that this can get better, with time and with help.
6. Monitor Social Media.
Many teens considering suicide often go on various social media sites to discuss their suicidal thoughts. Others may use social media, and websites, to look for pro-suicide thoughts and groups. Still, others may be bullied online, through cyberbullying, which might trigger their feelings even more so. As a parent, you need to not only discuss these potential dangers online and through social media, but also monitor what he might be saying online, and who he is having discussions with. Create a social media/online plan for the family, as well.
7. Maintaining Relationships and Connections
Teenage years can be filled with “angst” and “drama”. Indeed, your teen may be going through a phase where he wants to isolate himself in his room for long periods of time. As a parent, you need to keep conversations, relationships, and connections open. Spend additional time with him. Ask him to cook with you, to go for a walk together, to play games as a family. Let him know how valued he is, and that you enjoy spending time with him.
8. Safety a Priority.
Many teens attempt suicide with weapons found in the home. Ensure that all firearms and ammunition preferably are either removed from the home, or kept locked away, at all times. This also includes knives and sharp objects. In addition, keep all medications and alcohol of any kind locked away, and out of reach, as well. The same accounts for other poisons, such as anti freeze, household cleaners, Finally, make sure that your teen is not left alone in the house, where he can do harm to himself when no one is around.
9. Get Professional Help.
If you suspect that your child is struggling with depression, or considering suicide, seek professional help immediately. School counselors and professional therapists are trained to help. If you suspect that he may attempt suicide, call the Suicide Prevention Hotline, and call 911.
10. Recognize this may Take Time.
Suicidal thoughts are not something that goes away over night. For those teens struggling with depression and considering suicide, it may take a great deal of time for healing, and for hope. Remind your child that you are here for him, and that there may be additional “bumps in the road” to healing. Reassure him that you will be alongside him throughout this journey.
For those looking for help or for more information, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline and the Crisis Text Line.
Dr. John DeGarmo is an international expert in parenting and foster care and is a TEDx Talk presenter. Dr. John is the founder and director of The Foster Care Institute. He and his wife have had over 60 children come through their home as foster parents. He is an international consultant to schools, legal firms, and foster care agencies, as well as an empowerment and transformational speaker and trainer for schools, child welfare, businesses, and non profit organizations. He is the author of several foster care books, including The Foster Parenting Manual, and writes for several publications. Dr. John has appeared on CNN HLN, Good Morning, America, and NBC, FOX, CBS, and PBS stations across the nation. He and his wife have received many awards, including the Good Morning America Ultimate Hero Award. He can be contacted at drjohndegarmo@gmail, through his Facebook page, Dr. John DeGarmo, or at The Foster Care Institute.
